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Apr 21, 2017

3 Real Conversations Greenlight Triggered With My Kids

We’ve been using Greenlight Cards with my 8 and 10 year olds for about five months now. In the early days, the kids were overjoyed just to have cool looking cards with their names on it and my wife and I were pleased with the convenience of easier management of requests to buy Pokemon cards on Amazon.com or little games on the app store.

Over these past few months, however, I’ve realized the questions coming up and the conversations happening are much more meaningful long term for these kiddos than simply having plastic with their names on it. Here are three of my favorite talks we’re having on a recurring basis that wouldn’t have happened without the Greenlight Card.

What’s the difference between a debit and a credit card?

It started when we were checking out at the grocery store, and I let one of them buy his own “cool new pencils” using money on his Greenlight card. The keypad at the checkout asked him “Debit” or “Credit, ” and I told him to press DEBIT and then type in his PIN. He was happy to comply, but later in the car asked me, “What’s the difference between credit and debit?” This started our conversation about how using a debit card means you’re just transferring money that you already have to the merchant, whereas if you were using credit, you were actually borrowing money (for a fee of course) that you promise to pay back later. I explained to him that he’d need a few more years of “practice” demonstrating good decisions before having the privilege of getting real credit from me or anyone else!

How does gratuity work?

We love to eat out in our family. Friday night is Taco Night at Verde in Atlanta, a tradition that both the kids and parents love dearly. I usually will ask the boys if they have their Greenlight card and, if so, I’ll transfer money to their card (using my phone) so they can handle the bill. This is especially fun to watch because, of course, they had to be explained the process. First, you review the bill to make sure it’s accurate. Then you give the waiter your card so they can go swipe it. (I told them the waiters are going to find out if they have any money on the card!) Finally, what comes back is the receipt they will need to sign and add gratuity to.

We’ve had spirited debates occasionally about whether we had good service (earning the waiter sometimes 16-18 or even 20%!), or poor service (which might get them down as low as 12-15%). This exercise usually is also accompanied with some stellar math practice too. I confess, this Dad is usually only as much help as the calculator on my iPhone.

Side note: I’ve detected a pattern that is a life lesson for all of us. The most common indicator of “good service” by my kids is how often the waiter or waitress smiled at us. If they didn’t smile (but nailed the service), the kids have a hard time saying they deserve a big tip, but the times we sit with empty water glasses for half an hour but get a big smiling apology, the boys will usually argue that the service is awesome.

Contributing to the family with chores in exchange for an allowance.

My favorite new lessons learned lately have been around the importance of contributing on a regular basis with day-to-day tasks around the house. In return for this contribution, they receive a small allowance, calculated by their age.

Before allowances, my boys were constantly angling to make deals with me like: “If I do X, can I earn $5?” This bargaining went on so much that it became an argument to get the basic household tasks done. This is why we started an allowance. We made a short one-page contract with each of them that outlined the chores they were expected to do as often as possible and these were covered by the allowance. Any extra projects they could find to help out around the house that wasn’t on that list were fair game to make a deal (e.g. Help mom clean out the attic for $5).

Having the “automatic chores” for “automatic allowance” has been amazing. And it even works!! As a tip for other parents, here are some of the chores that have worked well for both the 8 and 10 year olds:

  • Set the table before each meal.

  • Make the drinks for each person.

  • Load the dishwasher.

  • Empty the dishwasher and put away things you can reach.

  • Make your own lunch before school.

  • No screen time in the mornings or before homework is done in the afternoons (not a chore, but seemed worth putting in writing to make life easier).

  • Take the trash out whenever asked, without complaining!

  • Roll the trash cans to the curb on Wednesday nights and empty ones back to the house Thursday.

  • Make your bed every day (eh, not so much, but once in awhile it happens).

  • Hang up your towels after showers.

  • Sweep the kitchen when asked.

I think our favorite part about this system has been the expectation that these are done WITHOUT COMPLAINING. You parents know what I mean. Sometimes, it’s easier just not having them to do a job so you can avoid another argument. But I suppose because we were so explicit when we came up with this system about the “no complaining” rule they actually heard it.

Plus, just like us adults, they like seeing that weekly allowance hit their accounts as well!

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