Tween age years: What's happening to your 9 to 12-year-old?
Share via
If you're parenting someone in the 9 to 12 age range, you've got a tween on your hands. This stage is all about big changes: physical, emotional, and social. It's a wild ride, so let's unpack what's going on and how you can support your tween through it all.
Body talk: The physical shuffle
So, let's talk about those growth spurts and the start of puberty. Here's a quick rundown:
Hungry much?
Expect the fridge to empty faster for some kids. Those growth spurts need fuel.
Shape-shifting
Tween bodies may start changing in ways that might surprise them (and you).
Be a financially smart family!
Mood rollercoasters
Hormones can turn your tween's mood on a dime—hello, first zits and mood swings.
Body image blues
With all these changes, some tweens start comparing themselves to others, which can be tough on their self-esteem.
The emotional maze
It's not just their bodies that are changing. Tween emotions are often on a whirlwind tour too. They're figuring out who they are, pushing boundaries, and sometimes, they might seem like they're from another planet. Here's the scoop:
Privacy, please
Your once open-book child might start guarding their diary like it contains state secrets. They might retreat to their room or closet more often, and start shutting their bedroom doors.
Rebel with a cause
Tweens often test the waters of independence and might start to challenge or argue with you more.
Emotional whiplash
One minute they're up, the next they're down. School, friends, and even their favorite hobbies can spark a wide range of feelings.
Social swirl
As if physical and emotional changes weren't enough, tweens are also navigating some increasingly complex social waters. Friendships may take center stage, and the pressure to fit in can be intense. Here's what you might notice:
Friend over family
Suddenly, hanging out with friends, whether in person or online, might trump family movie night.
Peer pressure cooker
The influence of friends and media starts to dial up. They might notice (and care) what others are doing, saying, or wearing more than they used to.
Identity quest
Many tweens start trying on different hats, seeing what feels right as they figure out their place in the world.
Milestones on the horizon
Despite the challenges, this age is also packed with exciting developmental leaps:
Humor me
They're crafting jokes that'll actually make you laugh (most of the time).
Puppy love
Crushes start cropping up, and love notes might be a thing.
Question everything
Get ready for some deep, philosophical questions over breakfast.
Problem solvers
Most tweens start to think things through more thoroughly and may make decisions that surprise you with their insight.
The tween years are a time of transformation and discovery. By understanding what your tween is going through and offering your support, you can help set the stage for them to grow into confident, capable young individuals. There's no one-size-fits-all approach, but leading with empathy, patience, and a healthy dose of humor can make a positive difference!
Want more? Visit the Greenlight Learning Center for helpful resources on all things family, finance, and fun.
Share via
Hey, $mart parents 👋
Teach money lessons at home with Greenlight’s $mart Parent newsletter. Money tips, insights, and fun family trivia — delivered every month.