Household rules for families: A guide to balance and responsibility

Every household and family is different and unique in their own ways, but all need household rules to maintain order and harmony. Clear rules can create structure for family members, promote respect throughout the house, and encourage responsibility to make living together easier on everyone. 

In this guide, we touch on household rules for families that can help create healthy family relationships. We'll explore rules for both young kids and teenagers, touching on areas of respect, responsibility, and digital safety.

Household rules for young kids (ages 4 to 8)

Regardless of age, every household should have rules that establish expectations for living in the house. House rules provide structure and order, but also set clear expectations and boundaries for kids that will teach them responsibility and a better appreciation for how to exist in other structures they'll experience in their life, like school and work. 

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It can be helpful to visualize a list of rules with a family rules chart and use family meetings to reinforce them and discuss broken family rules to resolve family conflict.

Speak kindly and use polite words

More important than a specific list of family rules, the entire family deserves respect and courtesy. Your house is a safe space for young kids, and it's important to reinforce that by ensuring adults always speak to each other with respect and siblings show each other the common courtesies they'd expect them to show anyone else.

Clean up toys and belongings daily

One of the simplest ways to help young kids build responsibility is with basic chores, and one of the easiest is cleaning up their own toys and belongings. After all, if they can't pick up their own things, how can you expect them to do anything else for themselves later? A chores and allowance app like Greenlight can be a great way to manage chore lists for young children and introduce them to the concept of earning an allowance.

Brush teeth and wash hands without reminders

It may seem odd to express basic hygiene as a "rule," but it's a useful framework for young kids. They may not understand the consequences of poor hygiene, but they do understand the consequences of breaking a rule. Making simple hygiene a family rule is a good way to help them build habits.

Ask permission before using devices or making purchases

An especially important rule in the age of online gaming, young kids should have clear expectations whenever they use your device. They should always get permission before using an adult's device, and you should have parental controls on to ensure only you can make purchases on an account.

Household rules for teens (ages 13 to 18)

As kids get older, family life can get a bit more chaotic. Teens often have rigorous schedules these days, and it can be harder to come by family time. However, they're more independent and likely need fewer basic guidelines. Instead, it may be more important to reinforce family consequences when violating household rules to ensure they understand that, as long as they're in your house, they still must abide by the family house rules.

Keep room and shared spaces clean

Everybody has a shared responsibility to keep shared spaces clean, but your teen may feel like they can do whatever they'd like in their own room. While they should have their privacy and independence, a household rule for everyone to keep their own spaces clean can help build better habits.

No phones at the dinner table or past bedtime

Even adults struggle with phone addiction, which is why it's important to set phone rules and stick to them. Your teens may think you're super embarrassing, but they model their behavior after you nonetheless, so establishing firm rules about phone usage can help promote happier family time and get everyone's noses out of their phones. It may even help support healthy eating habits if family dinner is more of an event where everyone pitches in to make a healthy meal together.

Be home by agreed curfew and share plans

Communication may be too broad to be a household rule, so this more specific alternative may work better. Once you agree upon a curfew, there's a fine line between when your teen is late or not. Likewise, if they don't tell you what they're up to for hours on end, that's a clear violation of a rule. Remember to enforce rules with consequences like grounding or taking away gaming time.

Respect privacy, but follow house expectations

Everybody has a reasonable right to privacy, but it's also a privilege for teens living under a parent's roof. Your first priority is their safety and development, and if they're unable to follow house rules, consider monitoring their internet usage or supervising their chores and other responsibilities until they prove they can independently follow rules.

Integrating financial rules for all ages

While parents may be the financial managers of a home, everyone should adhere to spending rules to help model good money habits. Some financial rules may include:

• Allowances are earned, not given.

• Everyone should save a portion of all money received.

• No purchase over a certain dollar amount can be made without discussing it with a parent first.

• Set clear savings goals and spending limits.

Allowances and spending money are useful tools to teach the value of money to teenagers. Help them set short-term and long-term savings goals with their allowance, and make sure they understand that even working adults don't spend their money on everything they want. There always has to be a balance.

Build responsible habits today with Greenlight's tools

Whether it's helping your children build better habits through household rules or teaching them the value of money, Greenlight offers solutions to support many parenting challenges. With the Greenlight app, parents can automate allowances, set up saving goals, and limit where and how kids spend their money. They can easily view balances, progress toward goals, and earn money for chores in the app, giving them clear insight into their own money. Start building financial literacy for kids and teens with the Greenlight app.